Willowacks

willowacks

1. New England. a wooded, uninhabited area.

The breeze shifted slightly, drawing lose curls across sun-washed skin. Lina shook the strands away, peering beneath her hand into the thrush. Nell was nowhere to be seen.

Overhead the full moon glowed a faint white against the pale evening sky, speaking of things to come.

“Nell!” A sharp whistle revealed irritation.

Another breeze rolled through, cooling the air around her.

This was the first time she’d lived this day, but something in the breeze made her question that fact. She knew this wind. Like the voice of an old friend she hadn’t seen since childhood, it called to her, beckoning her to remember.

If she closed her eyes, she could see herself there, in the tangle of the willowacks, even feel the scratchiness of grass between her toes.

There in the cooling of the day, that’s where Lina learned the meaning of love.

She resisted this painful moment that often tried to sneak out of from under

Draconian

“Madam Jocylene Depardieu will not be with you today…”

Large pairs of eyes in small faces focused on Mademoiselle Rivka whose hands were growing a paler shade of white from the way she was tightly clasping them. She seemed tinier than usual. Her frame was already slight, but now it seemed gaunt in the Saturday morning light. Her eyes looked tired and red. Never one to handle stress well, she mostly processed paperwork and payments for the small studio, even though she was easily a better ballerina than Madame Depardieu.

Where Rivka was graceful and light, Madam Depardieu was exacting and forceful. They were both talented, but watching them dance was like watching a knight and a fencer in their respective battles. Both moved with passion and precision, but one poured their passion into something more of a physical poetry–light and moving, easy yet strong.

“Mademoiselle Angela will take over for today’s class–” Mademoiselle Rivka’s voice hitched in the back of her throat as she gestured to Angela, her thin frail hands changing from white to splotchy red as blood rushed back into the tips.  She seemed to be debating whether she should say more,

Circumspect

circumspect

1. well-considered: circumspect ambition.
2. watchful and discreet; cautious; prudent: circumspect behavior.

Time was supposed to fix everything. It heals all wounds, was what they said. Everyone knew that. Everyone except for Jackie, it seemed. Most days she existed in a place oblivious to this truth, completely unreachable.

He would smile at her, expecting her to return the gesture, but she never did. Instead her eyes would gleam with a knowing, a suspicion of what might be based on what was.

It wasn’t her circumspect approach that concerned him, but the fact that fear seemed to be controlling her was beyond unnerving. It had been two years. But that just proved that even the most well worn sayings could be popular lies.

He remained hopeful for

Mavourneen

mavourneen

1. Irish English. darling; dear.

Curtains shifted in the light breeze. Air flowed throughout the house as doors were opened and closed every few minutes. Outside the sun was shining, but inside a shroud of heaviness hovered like cumulonimbus clouds on an April afternoon.

People walked to and fro, stopping to talk in hushed whispers, as if they were concerned about disturbing him. They didn’t know. He couldn’t be disturbed at this point. No one could break the thin glass that contained his heart; it was already cracked.

“I’m so sorry Benny…your mum’s in a better place…”

He knew there was so much he would miss about her.

Her laughter…her quick jokes about Old Man Smith and his perpetual sour moods…how she used to call out to him over the meadow when it was time to

Lucida

lucida

1. Astronomy. the brightest star in a constellation.

People kept coming by, getting in her face, apologizing  to her.

It’s okay to feel angry, they said. She didn’t feel angry. She actually didn’t feel anything at all.

No one had warned her about this numbness.

Minnie sat still on the pew, staring at the coffin. Only Ms. Abby’s nose and curly hair could be seen from her vantage point. But that was all she needed to see. That wasn’t really Ms. Abby in that ornate box of wood, Minnie could tell that from glance.

Ms. Abby had been full of life, always smiling, bubbling over with joy. This heavy body had anything but life in it. It lay solidly in the coffin, silently screaming that Ms. Abby was

Corybantic

corybantic

1. frenzied; agitated; unrestrained.
2. (initial capital letter) of or relating to a Corybant.

It’s one of those nights again. The nights when I’m startled awake. Usually it’s a nightmare that jars me. This time it’s the thunder. It’s one of the reasons I hate the Midwest, with it’s thunderstorms that seem to shake the very foundations of our three-bedroom house.

I’m so startled that I reach out for you. But your side of the bed is cold, empty and my soul starts to bleed again.

It’s like this most nights, waking from one nightmare into another one, only this other nightmare

Vagarious

vagarious*

1.  characterized by vagaries; erratic; capricious: a vagarious foreign policy.
2. roving; wandering: vagarious artists.

The prison was strangely bright and airy. It was the opposite of what he would’ve expected from a place of containment. Prisoners in bright green uniforms sat behind glass, speaking with their respective visitors. Some still wore their handcuffs as they spoke softly, some laughing, others crying.

David Michael absentmindedly adjusted his jacket that suddenly felt constricting in the cement room with its white-washed walls. He rubbed his damp palms against his jeans, baffled by his behavior. His own nervousness confused him.

This is what he deserved, David Michael told himself, realizing he had never felt more uncomfortable.

“He deserves this,” he found himself muttering aloud.

David Michael glanced around quickly to make sure

Thrummy

thrummy

1.  of or abounding in thrums; shaggy or tufted.

The day felt drab although the sun was shining and the weatherman was predicting fantastic temperatures and a long-awaited repreive from the onslaught of rain they’d been getting. It semed that eeveryone was excited  by that news.

But Alex was more intoxicated by his surroundings indoors. He stared at all the junk surrounding him, things his father would’ve called “treasure,” if he were still alive. Now al that treasure belonged to Alex. What he would do with all of his late father’s hoarded goods, he had no clue. he wasn’t even sure why his father would consider himself a collector of such trivial things that had no value and were utterly worthless.

Alex began meandering around his father’s workspace, critically looking at items, hoping to find something of worth.

He was headed toward the corner when he almost tripped over something. He didn’t even have to look down to know what it was. The familiar texture of

Heuristic

heuristic

1. encouraging a person to learn, discover, understand, or solve problems on his or her own, as by experimenting, evaluating possible answers or solutions, or by trial and error: a heuristic teaching method.

Life is pretty dumb without Nana Bettes in it. Most of the time I sit on the porch swing, not swinging, but just staring off into space as I think about Nana. Sometimes I like to sit at her grave and just talk out loud, but Carter caught me there a couple days back and threatened to disown me or tell our parents that I was crazy and obsessed.

I asked him what Nana Bettes would say about him disowning his older sister. He left me alone after that.

My parents want me to talk, but I never have too much to say until I

Noetic

noetic

1. of, relating to, or based on the intellect

Funerals were the worst. It’s not that I didn’t mind that people died–wait, I mean it’s not that I didn’t understand that people died–it was just hard to wrap my mind around being in a room full of people grieving the loss of a loved one. It was like being confined  with the wounded soldiers who’d just dragged their loved one off of the battlefield only to find out he died midway through the journey.

And somehow, I, the person least likely to be caught at a funeral had been corralled into speaking solemn words about someone I’d hardly known who was greatly loved by a bunch of people who were fearless at sharing their emotions and enjoyed physical contact.

An uncomfortable weight rested in the center of my abdomen and grew cold. The room itself felt overwhelming and stuffy.

I should have said no, but the more people cry the quicker I cave to requests. This was one of the many faults I’ve learned about myself. What makes it worse is the fact that

Pinnate

pinnate

1. resembling a feather, as in construction or arrangement; having parts arranged on each side of a common axis:a pinnate branch; pinnate trees.
2. Botany. (of a leaf) having leaflets or primary divisions arranged on each side of a common stalk.

The sound of rustling tree leaves filled the air.

Mary sat motionless, a box on her lap, a shovel at her feet, and grief in her soul. She had become oblivious to the setting sun, the cooling temperatures, and the degree of the deadly numbness within.

Her friends had advised her to, “seek professional help. There’s nothing wrong with talking to someone, Mary…”

Her husband had suggested medication, vacations, children, and finally, a divorce.

“Can’t we move on from this,” he had yelled at her, “do you have to keep punishing yourself every day for one mistake?”

He had moved on; she couldn’t.

“I didn’t make a mistake, Evan,” she had said, choking on her words,